the silent syntax

It’s been a whale week since Ah last scrieved. Ah’d a braw nacht on Thursday and the day, but Ah hidnae slept well for the rest o the days. Ah thocht the cauld weather wid help, but seems like Ah wis wrang.

Laist Friday, Ah went tae pick up ma Mulhouse Alsatian Grammer and ma Sundgau Alsatian dictionar. The dictionar’s surprisinly guid, but the grammer’s jist okay. It hus notes on Sundgau, but is in nae wey comprehensive. Since then Ah’ve been learnin a wee bit o Alsatian every day uisin ma Mulhouse and Strasbourg textbuiks. But yesterday Ah chyngit ma plan: Ah’m gonnae study ma Mulhouse and Bern textbuiks first. These past three days Ah did a gey wheen o scannin. Noo Ah’ve mair o my Alsatian, Aragonese, Asturian and Galician buiks scanned. This morn, while assemblin the PDFs afore the gym, Ah made a mistake for Ah coudnae tell which wis the mucklest atween twa nummers…

Friday evenin Ah went tae the board games at the association. We played “UNO No Mercy” and “Cards Against Humanity”. Then DG., P., V., A. and a lad whase name Ah dinnae ken went tae Burger King for supper. Yesterday morn Á. wis wi his ma, uncle and grannie at m., so Ah went doon tae say hi. Then this morn Ah went tae the gym tae tak a Monster tae Á. and we blethered a wee while.

At the gym, on Friday and Tuesday Ah did isolation exercises. At the weekend Ah worked oot wi I. On Monday Ah did a fu body session. Ah feel that ma performance isnae braw since Ah came back frae Kosovo, so Ah’ve decided tae dae legs every ither day tae hae mair time tae rest. Yesterday Ah wis plannin tae dae legs, but aw the leg machines were taken and I didnae want tae wait. So this morn Ah did legs alane and then back wi Á. Ma left haund fingers are a wee bittie better, but they still hurt…

On Friday Ah wis in a hurry for Ah had tae gang tae the association, yet Ah forgit tae unfreeze the meat, so Ah hid tae gang tae the supermarket tae buy some meat. On Saturday Ah meant buy potatoes, but endit up buyin chocolate cookies, eggs and the tortilla brand P. that Á. likes and aw. It’s actually the best supermarket tortilla Ah’ve tried, but a bittie expensive. Ah finished the cookies in twa days. On Tuesday, Ah went tae buy meat and rice, but Ah forgit the rice, so Ah hid tae gang there again afore ma meetin and endit up buyin mair discountit meat. Yesterday Ah boucht chicken, toilet paper and shampoo. Ah aye try tae make sure Ah hae an unopen item o everythin afore Ah run oot o it.

Ah’d tae gang tae Carrefour, but Ah’d been procrastinatin it. The day Ah wioot kennin went there durin the time for ASD fowks for the first time. They turn off the music, announcements and aw the annoyin beeps, and guess whit, apparently aw this time whit bothered me there were the noises. Ah’d never felt that muckle peace while shoappin there. Ah’ll definitely gang there again at 3pm. Ah wantit tae buy garlic flauchts for they dinnae hae them at Dia. Ah compared the prices and aw, and the tinned tomataes are mair expensive and the brown rice costs aboot the same, so I ainly got the items that were cheaper there: shower gel, cheese and pasta. Ah also ordered a muckle bottle o black pepper at Amazon since it’s cheaper there.

Ah’m afraid mibbe Ah’ll nae can copy ma auld HDD that’s dyin…

On Monday evenin Ah’d a meetin wi ma thesis superveesor. On Tuesday Ah wis near late for therapy. Laist year the platform adjusted it for the European simmer time, but this year it just didnae. At 4:45pm Ah got a notification, ran hame and made it jist in time.

Cookin yesterday, I droppit hauf o the bag o penne, and the day Ah droppit a load o rice while tryin tae open the bag.

Ah really hate MRW.

Yesterday morn Ah studied a wee bit o Interslavic. Ah had a guid nicht. Ah dreamed that Á. and me were colleagues at the uni. Ah dinnae ken whit wis oor major, but there wis even some auld fowks. We were plannin tae celebrate some birthdays, sae we were discussin whit each o us wid bring. Á. wis feart aboot havin a perfect notebook, in case the Prof. checked it, but Ah didnae gie it a damn. No sure whit course it wis for.

At the gym Ah did aw isolation exercises, 1/3 o them bilaterally and 2/3 unilaterally. Then Ah gaed tae the supermarket and bocht some meat and milk, but Ah forgot tae buy aits, sae Ah had tae go there again.

In the efternoon, Ah worked until the time tae go tae bed.

Yesterday Ah ended up buyin the A1 level o the Hue Vietnamese course. Ah kindae like the idea o pickin up a Central dialect, though Ah awready had a gey wheen o resoorces for Saigon Vietnamese, which is a soothern dialect. Since Ah dinnae hae eneuch resoorces for Hue dialect, Ah’ll uise Saigon as a fawback, and ainly if Ah cannae find the word in neither Hue nor Saigon Ah’ll resort tae Hanoi dialect. If I’m bein honest, Chu Nom is the ainly thin aboot Vietnamese Ah’m interested in. Ah wis feelin a bittie disjaskit lookin at aw characters that could be uised tae scrieve a single morpheme, but then fund a frequency list. Ah guess scrievin Central Vietnamese in Chu Nom is a goal mair aligned wi ma interests than, say, actually learnin Vietnamese tae fluency.

Ah didnae hae such a braw sleep last nicht. Efter breakfast, Ah gaed tae the gym and spent 2 hours bletherin wi Á. while eatin lucky chocolate. Efter he left, Ah worked oot alane. Ah had an aw unilateral exercises session, except for RDL and cable crunches. Á. said he’s gonnae workoot the morra. Ah hope he’ll come, but Ah’m aware it micht nae happen.

On ma way hame, Ah goed tae the supermarket tae buy milk and potatoes. Efter dinner, Ah studied a bit o Chu Nom and noo Ah gonnae work.

Yesterday Ah slept weel eneuch. In the morn, Á. and me did oor normal chest routine, and then I. and me did I.'s upper body workoot when he turnt up at the gym. Efter dinner, Ah daundert up tae Madrid tae meet some lads fae the autism association. On the wey there, Ah went ower ma Western Armenian flashcards and grabbed a Ferrero Rocher bar. No bad, but Ah really miss the Nutella in the Ferrero Rocher.

While S., D.G., and Ah were waitin for the ithers, there wis an awfy bad business atween a couple and a subway worker. Efter we met up wi I., J.L., and P., we daundert roond the Barrio de las Letras. Wance D.G. left (he got a concert), we decidit tae daunder up tae the karaoke bar. Google Maps said it wis nearby, but it took us forever tae get there. Since S., Mo., and Ah had tae leave early, we decidit tae gang fae supper first, and then the ithers went tae karaoke. It wis a richt scunner that Ah didnae get ma first karaoke experience in Spain, but at least the Peking deuk wis braw. When Ah got hame, I had a steak and a bowl o oats wi milk afore bed.

Sleep wisnae bad, but I woke up a bittie fauchelt. Ah dreamed Ah wis in an unkent place, full o buildins and bathrooms, like a camping site or somethin. There wis abody wha needed an Esperanto interpreter. Ah wisnae sure if Ah could help, for Ah hadnae spoken the leid for years.

Ah did a wee bittie o legs wi I. while waitin for Á., then we did oor biceps routine. Á. and I awready hae a new workoot schedule. Á. asked if I wis gonnae help him close the gym the night, but Ah telt him he didnae need me for that, sae why would Ah? Since he isnae stayin at his grannie’s onymair and we’ll likely see each ither less, Ah’m plannin tae come roond every noo and then, mibbe bring some ham and cheese pieces or a lucky chocolate, and jist blether. And if he’s ever stervin or cravin for somethin, Ah could still bring him a drink or a snack if Ah’m free, but definitely no every Sat and Sun.

Ah’ve topped up my Kosovar SIM card for wan year. Ah hud forgotten tae cancel ma data package and wasted aw ma credits. Ah went tae the supermarket and aw, and near forgot tae buy the only thin Ah really needed: cheese.

Ah’m very tempted tae get some online Central Vietnamese courses and drap Soothern Vietnamese awthegether. But should I?

Last nicht, Ah kindae decidit tae pit Dioula and Hiri Motu on ma leid bucket list, and afore Ah kent it, I’d spent a lot o time readin aboot Mande an Austronesian leids. Sae aye, Ah endit up waukenin at aboot 12pm the day. Ah telt I. no tae wait for me, took ma time wi ma breakfast, then heidit tae Dia tae grab a coffee for Á. He’d askit me tae bring him a fork and aw.

Ah did Cable Biceps Curls wi I., but didnae hit shouders and tris 'cause it wis chest day for me and Á. We blethered a bit the three o us, then I. heidit aff. I’d brocht ma scale tae the gym 'cause we were plannin tae check I.'s bodyfat, but Ah totally forgot aboot it.

While Á. wis bletherin wi M., Ah did ma chest workout, assumin he wisnae gonnae wirk oot wi me the day. I’m no jealous, it’s jist that he’s got ither priorities. Then when Ah wis feenisht, he comes up tae me and says he’d jine me in a bit. Ah said aye, 'cause he wis gonnae mak up for his missin leg day on Friday, and since I’d done full body that day, daein legs wisnae sic a bad idea. Sae while Ah wis waitin on him, Ah went tae Ahorramas tae get masel some Napolitanas, and that wis ma lunch. Ah read a wee bit aboot Hiri Motu and Chamorro grammar and aw.

Á. and I did oor leg workout, except hams, but I’d aw ready done thaim yesterday, sae nae bother. Ah spotted him on Bench Press and did a few extra sets wi him, jist for the fun. Then when he muived tae Incline Dumbbell Press, he felt somethin wrang wi his shouder, sae he cawed it a day. Efter that, we did a wee bit o jiu-jitsu. Ah wis real chuffed we got tae wirk oot thegither.

On ma wey back hame, ma mam sent me a message, sae Ah had a video call wi ma parents and ma brither while Ah wis makin denner.

Insteid o focusin that muckle on Austronesian leids frae the Philippines, Ah think Rapa Nui and Rukai micht be deid interestin tae explore. O coorse, alang wi Paiwan and Balinese.

Ah’d been puttin aff journalin for 17 days since I got back fae Kosovo, cause I couldnae mind ony mair everythin that happened durin the 2 weeks I spent there. Then last nicht Ah ken it’s been a hale month^[1] since ma last entry, and I couldnae sleep for thinkin aboot how tae fill that gap.

Efter a bit, I thocht it’s mibbe best jist tae stairt fresh. But this time roond Ah’m gonnae try bein a bit mair flexible and let masel skip a day or twa noo and then. I can aye scrieve a wee catch-up entry later on. That’s definitely healthier, but Ah’m no shuir if ma autistic rigidity’s gonnae let me get awa wi it.

Anywey, it feels guid tae be back tae journaling, especially noo that I’m no goin tae therapy ony mair. I’m needing tae find a new therapist ASAP.

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1. Ah actually tried workin oot how mony days had passed since ma last entry and somehow kept gettin 25. Whether fuckin dyscalculia’s tae blame or no, I endit up uisin a website tae dae it and it says 31. ↩︎